i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize