I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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