we have officially lost it.
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
