You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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