good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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