can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize