I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
