Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
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