party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
