kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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