No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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