yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.