I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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