No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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