First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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