i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
