You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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