I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
