Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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