goodnight i made you a song goodbye
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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