I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
