I'm going to rape someone's good day.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
