Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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