Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize