Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
