Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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