Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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