IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
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Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
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Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize