At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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