Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize