he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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