how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you win again, gameday.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
