You know, be my cock's hype man.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
