What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize