Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Randomize
