I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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