just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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