hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i permit you to call me
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize