sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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