For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Randomize
