Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
