She's JV to your varsity
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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