she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize