I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
