Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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