I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
