No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize