Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
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