look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
