I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just sent this text using only my big toe
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
