I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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